I coined this term five years ago and am still claiming club membership:  “New Millennium Spinster.”

It was something the deejay on my car radio said about old women hanging out in the clubs– a thought so startling hit me that I almost rear-ended the car in front of me.   I am a spinster!  I confess that me –  ex-fly girl, ex-trend and bar hopper – am a woman who has remained single beyond the conventional age for marrying. 

That is at least’s first definition of spinster.  Culled from childhood, my definition of spinster summons up images of old women who sported a similar uniform – long shapeless skirt, sturdy dark shoes, hair pulled back tightly into a bun, bi-focals attached to a chain around their chicken-crepe necks, veiny hands and knobby fingers.  They were sometimes scolding librarians, judgmental church secretaries, critical teachers, or the eccentric neighbor who on occasion doled out crystallized candy orange slices.  She was a friend’s doting auntie who lived the life grand, cruised for months on end to foreign countries and returned with unusual gifts, exotic smells, and interesting tales.
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Is that me?  Surely not!  No, not by any means! but it must be since I am formally fifty and unmarried; for good measure I’ll also throw in the fact that I have no children. It kinda bugs me that that men who have remained single beyond the conventional age for marrying don’t have a title.  Why aren’t they also singled out?  Since we spin, maybe they can smith, as in being a blacksmith:  Spinsters and Smithers.   Doesn’t have much of a ring does it?

Now that I’ve gotten over the shock, this spinning space doesn’t look too bad.  I say it is time to give a new face to the Spinster stereotype. Just call me spunky ‘cause I’m subscribing to the latest buzz that fifty is the new thirty and forty is the new twenty…which would mean twenty is what, er..still twenty, yea.  Hmm, and how does being a cougar fit in with the spinster concept?

Are you a New Millennium Spinster? Post your thoughts below – don’t edit them, just write!
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  1. Wow, I just saw this post and had to giggle a little. “New Millennium Spinster” is interesting and somewhat alarming terminology. 🙂 My take on those of us who have been blessed to be fifty+, mentally and physically healthy, unmarried, and childless (both male and female) is that we have been given a unique gift of FREEDOM! Now how we choose to use that gift depends upon our outlook and perspective.

    I refer to myself as “Happily Never Married” because I believe God has kindly kept me from making some terrible decisions that would have scarred my life and the life of others. I don’t bear the wounds of the majority of my formerly married and now divorced friends. I have never had to drag around that kind of baggage of guilt or betrayal, or of not being the best parent. The gift to me is being able to walk into each new day without divided loyalties and with one simple question, “Lord what would YOU have me do this day?”

    Just to illustrate, the Apostle Paul says in 1 Corinthians 7:33-35 (Amplified Bible):
    33 But the married man is anxious about worldly matters–how he may please his wife–
    34 And he is drawn in diverging directions [his interests are divided and he is distracted from his devotion to God]. And the unmarried woman or girl is concerned and anxious about the matters of the Lord, how to be wholly separated and set apart in body and spirit; but the married woman has her cares [centered] in earthly affairs–how she may please her husband.
    35 Now I say this for your own welfare and profit, not to put [a halter of] restraint upon you, but to promote what is seemly and in good order and to secure your undistracted and undivided devotion to the Lord.

    Now, I believe that family is critical and being a husband, wife, mother, or father is truly a “calling” and a ministry that should never be taken lightly. But so is the single life–the task for us all is to stay focused on knowing and fulfilling God’s will and purpose for our own lives!

  2. Whichever side of the fence we sit on, it is most important to remain open to receive God’s love and blessings, and to reflect that back on others. Thank you for that insightful dialogue GeGe.

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